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Why my kid doesn’t need a blog… yet

January 12th, 2009 Leave a comment Go to comments

I’ve been thinking hard about developing a specific blog documenting my steps into fatherhood and Jackson’s early adventures into life. Here is my conflicting issue. I have no problem with people who blog about their kids, in fact I think it’s great and I subscribe to many of them (Burgh Baby being my absolute favorite), but when Jackson in his teens, goes into management or becomes some form of public figure, do I want to save him from the embarrassment factor that daddy talked about his first poo or posted pictures of him running around in his birthday suit when he was 2? Maybe this is something new in parenting I have to think about since everyone has a blog. What if in 10-15 years it doesn’t matter since everyone’s life is online anyway?

There is a line of privacy I do keep. Unless stamped with her approval, you wont see Lushie on here, I won’t specifically talk about my family or friends who aren’t already in some form of social media, and I wont post pics of friends/family without asking.

I’ve made the decision to make my life rather public to a point. I have a podcast and have written about alcohol so I know that there are pictures of me having a drink and socializing. That’s part of the gig. I don’t hide anything I do online because I’m a media creator. This is what I do. Jackson, however, hasn’t decided who he’s going to be. Heck, he’s still 3 months away from being born!  Don’t get me wrong, I’ll have pics on this site and probably talk about parenting but for the most part I’m going to try and keep him offline until he’s at an age to choose for himself… like say at 30 :)   Maybe I make a new blog about fatherhood in general and put my own restrictions on what I post.

I’m confused as to what I’m going to do so here is where I ask you, what do you think about documenting your child at such a young age. Where do you draw the line?

cheers!

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    Categories: Family, Fatherhood, Misc.
    • http://www.burghbaby.com Burgh Baby

      You will never ever see a nekkid photo of Alexis, a photo that I myself would be embarrassed of if I were the one in it, or read a story that I think would bother me if I were the subject. And, if someday Alexis says she doesn’t want anything out there? Poof. The whole thing comes down.

      I think of the site as her baby book (which it actually is because I never did start a “real” baby book for her), so it’s comprised of documenting steps and is, in every way, a series of my love letters to her. If I look back at a post and think I’ve broken from that, I take it down instantly.

      It’s tough to find the line you’re comfortable with, and I think the line moves a little every day. You just have to figure out what works for you and constantly adjust. At the end of it all, though, I do think Alexis will appreciate being able to read my “journal” of her life. I hope so, anyway.

    • http://www.burghbaby.com Burgh Baby

      Oh, and that’s also the reasons our names aren’t on the blog. Her first name alone will get you nowhere with Google (except lead you to a porn star–seriously), and if someone leaves any parental first names in comments, I delete the comment. Our last name is nowhere to be found. Family members have actually complained that they can’t find it using a search, but I consider that a very excellent problem.

      Facebook is my only weak link, and I’m fixing that up proper right now.

    • http://myverylastnerve.blogspot.com Gina

      I don’t post a lot about my kids, but I will post photos and funny stories. But, like Burgh Baby, no nekkids. And I don’t use my kids’ names or our last name or town (other than the it being in the burgh area).

    • Paul

      As someone who will probably be blogging sometime soon, you make some great points. I think it’s prudent to think twice before pulling someone into an online world they may not want to be a part of. I think younger people generally have less worry about being “out there” since they’ve basically grown up with an online identity. However older people (and those of us somewhere in between!) may tend to cherish some form of privacy.

      I say ask before you expose your friends and family to the world, no matter the intentions.

    • Paul

      Of course, I realize that you can’t ask young children what they think…I guess I would choose against it until they reach an older age as you suggest.

    • http://haveagoodsandwich.org Woy

      I, like you, have vexed over this particular topic. I’ve made a decision to write about WoyGirl under very specific circumstances. We prefer it that way. Her growing up, for now, is for the real live world.

    • sunshine

      when the time comes you’ll know what to do.. as for now i think you got if figured out..

    • http://alesrarus.funkydung.com Eric W

      Good thoughts. :)

      I’ve been thinking of starting a daddy blog soon. If I do, I probably won’t be posting any pics. I’ll also try to keep identifying details (like full names) to a minimum. I don’t expect to have complete privacy or anonymity, so I won’t even try. I just don’t want my family and friends to discover their personal information is an easy Google search away. It’s enough for me, though, if I can avoid being stalked and keep my family quasi-anonymous via obscurity and obfuscation.

      BTW, all of the pics of my son that I post to Flickr are marked as private and are only viewable by those I designate as family or friend. Some blogging parents leave their kid’s pics public, which surprised me, but they have to decide what’s best for their own families, just as you’re trying to do for yours.

      Best of luck to you. :)

      P.S. Maybe we could start a group daddy blog together. :)

    • http://www.mindbling.blogspot.com mindbling

      Cheers to you for wrestling with this. I was in the position of needing to learn more about the Internet and ‘social media’ so I could keep up with jr. I hate to sound like a cliche, but, kids today!

      I tried the ‘protection’ mode, where I locked the crap out of everything, denied him access to half of the world, and all that happened was he went down the street to his friends house to see it. I monitor his phone, his web history, and I would monitor his every thought if I could.

      The fact of the matter is, he is in a whole different place than I was at 13. He knows more, he has seen more, he understands more, and if I don’t understand it, too, I can’t talk to him about it in a way that matters.

      While I protect him as much as I can, and his real name (as well as mine), are protected as much as I can, at the end of the day, when any of us decide to live a portion of our lives online we take a risk.

      For me, it’s a risk that pays off. I love having an outlet for my creativity, I love being a part of an amazing community, and I love that in a small way, jr. is, too. He has gained so much from the connections that I have made since I stepped onto the Web.

      The fact is, whether 80 people read it or 80,000, being a parent is a bond shared by many of us, and I hope that you can find some way to add your voice to those that help the rest of us get through this zany mess that is raising kids.

      Whatever you decide, Jackson is one lucky kid.

    • http://sportsocracy.org TheJim

      I’ve struggled with this same subject. Jack’s birth had a public face to it, by virtue of me being a public (relatively speaking) figure within SM. However, I don’t maintain any kind of personal blog or site, so it’s been easy for me to avoid the conflict of posting intimate details about his existence.

      I had a public Flickr set open for a while after he was born, but I’ve since closed that off to only friends/family.

    • http://douglasderda.com douglas

      Wow thanks everyone for the great replies and advise. I think for now Teaspoon will stay offline unless I post some pics. I like the Idea of Flickr and may do that also. I do need some kinda outlet for the randomness I’ve seen thus far as a dad to be. Eric, I could be up for that!

      Thanks everyone for your input. I truly appreciate it!

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